It's been a long, busy week, and this journal has certainly suffered because of that, as the large gap in entries shows. I've spent far too much time on the motorways, and not nearly enough time relaxing at home. The logical part of my mind tells me to move house, rent a place nearer work. But the nagging fear of change warns me against it. I don't really know what to do, and for now, I don't even feel like thinking about it.
Thursday saw the arrival of a new nephew, Isaac Jay, weighing in at 8lb 7oz. I went to see him last night, and he sure is a cutie. I laid on the floor for a while, with him resting on my right arm, asleep. People have started telling me that I look 'natural' with the kids, or that they 'suit' me, which makes them sound like fashion accessories. That may or may not be true, but for now I've got no intentions of catching up with my sisters in the procreation stakes. I get enough late nights and early mornings as it is!
Simon finally emailed. I wasn't worried, it's quite common for him to disappear seemingly without trace for many months on end, leaving only a fragment of an address, or a work phone number behind him. You know that sooner or later, when he feels like it, he'll respond to your email, or phone you out of the blue with all sorts of news and anecdotes. The way I speak, you would think he's been trekking through deepest Africa, whereas in truth he's merely been programming in Hampshire.
He sounds somewhat bored by working life, which doesn't surprise me. He has greater things to offer this world, I'm sure of it. But there's no point pushing him, it doesn't work. So, I'm just sitting here, waiting, until the day I suddenly receive that email from him suggesting a viable business proposal. When that day comes, I too will probably be ready to leave the rat race, the blue chips, and the cubicle walls behind me to strike out in partnership. But for now, the inspiration eludes us both, it seems.
I'm going to sign off for now. I have spreadsheets to perfect, webpages to design, and biographies of mathematicians to read. Not everybody's idea of a great Saturday, I know, but this is how I relax, and relaxation is what I need most right now.